Sex is very much associated with people who are young and who fit into the culturally controlled ideals of physical attractiveness, however this is a very distorted picture. People of all shapes, sizes and abilities can enjoy fulfilling sexual relationships.
Whether it is lifelong or acquired, disability or illness can potentially affect any aspect of sexuality. Questions about having children, retaining relationships, or being able to enjoy sex can be raised. Some disabilities may cause a loss of fertility, but this does not mean a loss of sexual function. If sexual function is reduced, it may be possible to increase it again. A loss of sensation in the genitals does not mean that sexual pleasure is no longer possible. Keeping the discussion open about sexuality and acknowledging sexual needs and preferences allows disabled people to adapt to their own unique circumstances and enjoy their own sexual experiences.
Each disability affects each individual differently, and so responding to this in a sexual way will involve a high degree of personal consideration. This may involve experimentation with a variety of sexual activities, or a variety of positions to achieve pleasure and comfort. Some people use sex-toys (vibrators etc.), additional lubricants or concentrate more on non penetrative activities. There are many erogenous and sensitive areas of the body, other than the genitals, and an enjoyable sexual relationship will discover these as well.
An essential part of fulfilling sexuality is communication. Openness between sexual partners can create the right environment to develop particular ways of giving and receiving sexual pleasure. Telling each other what you like and don't like, and not criticising, builds greater understanding of needs and desires. Safer sex is important and other sections of this website give more detailed information about how to stay safer, happy and healthy (see the section on contraception for more information).
